From the Archives: A Story's Journey

Came across this old email in my inbox. It was a response to a flash-fiction submission I made to Ink-Pot:

Date: Sat, 04 Sep 2004 09:37:23 -0400
Subject: Re: FF, Tolu Ogunlesi, Matilda, 1000 words

Thank you for submitting "Matilda" to Ink Pot. As usual, I enjoyed your fresh voice, images and vignettes. Unfortunately, though, I'm going to have to pass.

While this piece is interesting, it feels a bit scattered. It feels a bit, in the end, as if it doesn't quite know how it got there. One of the difficulties I had was with tense. You begin in present tense with the couple together, in the middle you recall their falling out and you end in present tense with the couple apart. It was hard for me to reconcile, then, just what exactly was going on, when.

I hope you will continue to send us your work and wish you best of luck with your writing.

I eventually reworked the piece. It became:

1) Longer, and more importantly
2) Less "scattered" - I hope! :))
3) Renamed

and was accepted for publication by Pindeldyboz almost a year later (July 2005)

Wed, 27 Jul 2005 22:23:21 -0500
From: "pindeldyboz online"
Subject: Re: Fiction Submission: THE MAN OF THE LAST WORD by Tolu Ogunlesi

Hi Tolu --
If it's still available, I'd love to accept "The Man of the Last Word" for publication in Pboz. I'll use the bio at the bottom of thedocument unless you decide on a newer one, and we'll let you know when it's going live...